“Up” Your Convivial Game: Part III

Decision Three: Choose your company wisely / Invest in your dreams

In this last episode to my 3rd part blog series of “Up” Your Convivial Game, let me tell you about a plane ride I took from Dallas to New York City last fall.

I was at a point when I was eager to start focusing on some personal goals; I’d been all about my family and would always be about them, but in order to contribute and share a better understanding of the world with my two sons, and to share my gifts with the world, I still have to go out and live in this world and pursue some dreams of my own. Otherwise, who the hell am I to tell my children to follow their dreams, have no fear, and that anything is possible and worth exploring? And what sense of conviviality can I preach if I don’t experience it for myself?

It was early fall and I was ready to “up” my convivial game, so I’d entered into a contest to win a free ticket to Marie Forleo’s Rich Happy & Hot LIVE in New York City- an event about making money as a woman entrepreneur, and focused on health, relationships, soul, happiness, and making a contribution in the world. It had my name all over it.

Once the results were announced and I learned another gal had won, I accepted my fate and knew that if I wanted to go, I would have to pay my own way. Normally, the story should end there, but for defiant creatives like me, it was just the beginning.

Something deep within was pulling at my coattails,

saying, “There’s a way…find the way.” Instead of thinking, Oh well…lucky winner…it wasn’t meant to be, I thought, Wait a minute…this can’t be it. I HAVE to be there. By making this choice for myself, and paying a pretty penny for the event ticket (read: investing in myself), I would be unlocking an unknown door that was crucial to my personal growth and fulfillment. This desire to live differently, to reach beyond what I think is possible and have an impact was so strong that it called me to action and got me to start thinking creatively on how I could make this experience a reality.

What would I gain from it all? I’d fulfill my goal to travel solo, meet people in the business I was in, gain validation for what I believe I can offer, and would come back home inspired and ready to “do me” in every convivial way I could imagine. Life, love, and business was about to get kicked up a notch. There would be no turning back.

For me, the question went from, “How much is this going to cost?” to “How much are my dreams worth?” Through creative thinking, strategic brainstorming, and having important conversations with the people who could make a difference, the universe conspired in my favor and I was soon headed for New York.

This would be a solo trip, (which according to my friend, Liz Longacre of the animal-loving site Your Time Travels, traveling alone is “kinda badass”). By the simple fact of going somewhere I’d never been, where I knew no one, and with no one to accompany me, I was fulfilling a personal goal I had set for myself a couple years prior. That in itself was empowering. Can you imagine how beneficial it was for me physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually to face that unknown?

Considering all the messages we get from society about how vulnerable and weak we are as women, going somewhere all on your own is pretty major. Whether it’s to a new place you’ve never traveled to or an entirely new way of life you’re choosing for yourself, there is power in such choices.

When my mother heard I was going to New York City on my own, she said, “What?! You can’t go alone! To New York?! Oh no…you have to take a man with you!” I laughed, because I was expecting this response from feisty mama mia, and said, “Oh mom…that’s the worst thing you could say to me right now.” I made it clear that I was handling business and off I went.

Flying over the New York skyline, I saw a rainbow

off the left wing of the plane and wanted to believe it was a nod from the Great Creator, a colorful bit of validation for seeking my heart. I set my intentions, backed my beliefs with personal action, and when there didn’t seem to be a way, I didn’t surrender to what appeared to be “reality.”

Instead, I created my own reality by believing in the mere possibility of it. I landed in New York City and was now being driven by yellow cab into the city, luggage in the trunk, camera in hand, skyline on my left. It was just me, my dreams, and the Big Apple. If that moment had a song, it would’ve been Nelly Furtado’s Explode for these lyrics:

We’re counting the stars, we’re counting the stars
We’re not very far, we’re not very far
And it’s you and me in the open air
It’s truth or dare, we don’t care

I explored the city, had plenty epiphanies at the conference, and met some amazing, beautiful, entrepreneurial women who are just as passionate and willing to chase their dreams as I am. The experience was unforgettable, one that can never be taken from me. Material possessions are easily acquired and come and go without much significance to them, but the experience of traveling, of venturing into the unknown, of learning more about yourself and your place in the world is unmatched and yours to claim and cherish always.

Traveling solo grounded me in the place where I currently was at in life and gave me motivation to start working on what I wanted for the next phase.

It made me thankful for the people who currently make up my world. I came home ready to give my husband and boys a million hugs and kisses. Exciting times were ahead for me and I was confident that my family would reap the benefits of the new sacrifices I was prepared to make.

By placing myself in a room full of dreamers, a new world had opened up to support my own dreams. I would’ve never known this world had I not made a conscious choice to want to be part of it and then acted on that choice. I experienced fear and doubt in what lie ahead, but know this is normal when one embarks on a new adventure, or place one has never gone. I’m fully aware that you just need to jump and believe the net will appear, because it will. I’ve tested this idea plenty of times and have never fallen to disappointment.

When it comes to what you dream, you’re never alone. It may seem that way at first, but it’s only because you need to be resourceful and reach out more. When you make conscious decisions in your best interest, choose your company wisely, are generous with your gifts, and you contribute to the success of others in your life, guess what comes back your way? Mmm…hmm…I think you know this, (wo)man! In her book The Creative Habit, author, Twyla Tharp calls generosity a “reverse luck”. We all have the ability to be generous and create a world of good fortune for ourselves.

A convivial life is about dreaming, creating, exploring, and working to make your life what you want it to be.

You won’t have all the answers in the beginning, and they won’t make any special appearances if you take no action or don’t remain open to receive them. It’s all energy, movement, pushing your limits, recognizing what feels especially uncomfortable and what feels amazing, sharing your talents, having faith and sharing your knowledge and love.

Trust, intention, emotion, desire, faith, action, resourcefulness, creativity in the form of problem solving, keeping an open mind- as in avoiding thoughts that cause one to stop thinking, planning, acting, listening- personal motivation, outrageous belief in oneself…these are all important factors to making greatness happen for you and in your life.

To make TheConvivialWoman.com what it is right now, as you see it, I’ve had to take time away from my family, socializing, opportunities to lounge, get proper sleep, etc., whether it be evenings or the weekends to make it reality, but that’s what you gotta do in order to “do you”.

What’s the reality you’re dreaming up? Find a way…there is a way. And if you need some help, that’s what I’m here for. You’ve got the dream, I’ll bring the strategy. Consider booking a session with me and let’s get this ball rolling in your court.

Cheers to defiant creativity and a convivial way of living,

Tweet    

8 Responses so far. Add Your Own.

Leave Your Own Comment.

Off-topic or inappropriate comments will be edited or deleted. Email addresses will never be published. Thanks.

Name (required) Email (required) Website  Submit Comment