Goals

In the midst of change, savor the convivial memories

I hope all is going great in your world and that you are facing each new day with the courage to do that ONE THING that your heart is calling you to do.

Today, my heart has me savoring all the good memories I’ve had in my Dallas home since this is the last weekend I will officially reside here.

I’m still in the midst of moving to Austin. Thankfully, I can say it hasn’t been stressful! Finding a home in our new city is taking a tad bit longer, but I know it’s coming. This delay gives me that much more time to consider all the memories my current home offered me.

Everything is falling into place as we say farewell to this space.

This was the home that birthed the idea of a Convivial Society (in my kitchen as I talked to a dear friend), where The Convivial Woman wrote late into the night (as my hard-working husband and sweet boys slept, the place I had many discussions with hubby about creating our family’s future in Austin, where we made our first attempts at cooking Thanksgiving and Christmas dinners…

It’s where I shared the news and sonogram picture with my husband of our first and second baby, where we enjoyed many playdates and visits from family and friends, where I designed the convivial website with the help of some very talented people, where I hosted one unforgettable brunch for some special women in my garden. There’s so much to remember and appreciate…

It’s easy to look ahead and imagine yourself somewhere new, somewhere different, but there is always something to gain from the moment, the current experience, wherever it is spent, with whomever.

With any big change you make, uncertainty is…certain.

I have tons of questions about this next chapter in my life.

Where will I live?

What new friendships await me?

How will my current friendships hold up with the distance?

How will this town proclaiming to keep things weird nurture my convivial spirit?

How’s it going to feel putting “roots down” finally?
(I was so resistant to doing so in Dallas)

How will it feel being three hours away from my parents
(we’ve always been close)?

Who will help me with my kids when on convivial business and hubby’s not available? (Mom was five minutes away!)

How will my husband and I create more romance in this Texas hot spot?

Sometimes it’s hard for me to settle into the now, but I’m working that muscle right NOW by writing. It’s my version of spirituality…the creative kind. This whole business of “being present” of focusing on the “now”-I say, that’s what you call practicing faith. It’s having faith when you don’t know what is ahead and you don’t have all the answers. It’s a conscious choice to find peace and comfort with what is, right now.

When it comes to what you truly desire, your efforts follow a close second behind.

When entering a new phase of life, sharing your writing, your product, your service, simply who you are with the world, be prepared to feel uncertainty for the details of your path won’t always be clear cut, but you can get clear by cutting all that you know is not serving you or bringing you closer to that ONE THING your heart beats for. Only you know what that is…

The world is full of opinions and judgment and everyone is working to figure out their own way. For that reason, concentrate on yourself and make every effort to live according to that convivial vision only you can have for your life.

Here’s to peace, love, and constant change,

P.S. EXTRA EXTRA: I’m writing a book! I would love for you to join me on this new adventure! Join me on The Convivial Woman fanpage so I can share all the juicy details with you as they happen!

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CHOOSING (where) TO LIVE: following my heart to Austin, TX

In 2009, I took this picture while showing my husband around Austin, Texas. We were passing through a random neighborhood near downtown and a small sign hanging to the side of this home’s front door caused me to hit the brakes and reverse with tires screeching, saying, “Oh my God, I don’t believe this!” When my husband got a closer look, he was just as baffled. More on the sign’s message soon…

Two years later, I’m here to tell you my family is moving from Dallas to Austin, TX. This potential move has been at the forefront of our dinner table conversation since I first proposed the idea in 2009, so it’s cause for me to jump for joy!

There were many times I thought it might not ever happen

-initially, my husband wasn’t eager about starting over in a new city. Most men aren’t. However, he eventually grabbed onto the anchor I kept throwing out to him from my imaginary turquoise-colored sailboat. You know, the one I’ve yet to buy to set asail on the waters of Lake Travis…it’s on my To-Have list once I settle in Austin. Hey, who said dreams can’t have a domino effect?

Before The Convivial Woman came to be, this space was known as Convivial Society and the mantra I was inspired to live by was

“Know Your Power. Live Your Life.”

For many years, I had this lingering feeling of resistance when it came to settling down in Dallas. Big D was where I was brought by my parents at age 16 to live after my brother started getting involved in Chicago street gangs.

I finished high school here, got my start in Banking while I put myself through college, thus graduating from The University of Texas at Dallas, and I found love and got married here.

I was busy and had my head in a lot of things, but once all those projects were complete, my heart was free to roam.

I acquired many friendships and enjoyed living five minutes away from mom and dad, but still…every time I’d travel, there went that lingering feeling again.

Initially, I wanted to move to San Francisco or back to Chicago, but I allowed outside factors and other people’s feelings to get in the way of my personal endeavors. So, I stayed put. I tried the whole “Change your thoughts, Change your life” mentality and told myself, “If Mark Cuban can make it here, I can too!” But I was lying to myself which only fueled the fire within.

I’d already had my first son, a cute little house and two dogs to call home, but it wasn’t all I envisioned. Was I an unsatisfied, ungrateful woman for wanting more, or perhaps just something slightly different? I didn’t think so.

I was willing to make adjustments and be flexible in my dreaming, but not fully surrender it.

Knowing that I didn’t want to venture too far from mom and dad (for grandkids sake- I know what it’s like to grow up without extended family and holiday get togethers) I decided if there was anywhere in Texas I wanted to be, it was Austin.

I tapped into my 6-year-old little girl’s mind and remembered the hills and winding roads, the sweetest summer time nectarines picked up at H.E.B., the grandeur of the state capitol building, and the feeling of care-free joy when I visited my family in this Texas town. It truly felt like a homecoming for me. Every time. Can’t forget to mention my first tour of 6th street riding on my uncle’s Harley at 16 years old!

Austin reminded me of my family, my roots, something so familiar to me, so I set my sights on her and gathered the courage to tell my hubby.

It was a bumpy ride at first, but I told myself that compromising this feeling would be fatal to my fierce spirit.

There were times when it seemed not worth fighting for, but as I stared out toward my backyard one morning, I remember thinking to myself (just as a tear rolled down my cheek) that I’d be a hypocrite to talk the talk of “Know Your Power, Live Your Life” if I didn’t walk the walk and fight the fight…IF it had to be one at all. It was a true test of will and desire and thankfully, my husband and I made it happen… together. That is KEY.

In the early stages of this dream, when it seemed hard to get on the same page, I once imagined myself driving down I-35 toward Austin, yelling out the window like Winona Ryder in Mermaids, “I wanna lead a violent and exciting liiiiiiife!”- with belongings in tow and hubby tied up in the trunk, of course. There’s a Thelma and Louise aspect to me, but I wasn’t determined to make it happen that way!

Compromises can be made, but when it comes to what makes you happy, if the other doesn’t give you a chance to explore that feeling, then there are other issues to consider between the two of you.

And the compromises have to feel good for both or they’ll resurface in other ways later. So, be true to you and everyone reaps the benefits, even if there’s resistance at first.

So, we’re off to the state capitol of Texas and in search of our next home! It’s bitter sweet to be packing up and a surreal sensation to be the one putting up the “For Rent” sign in front of my house. Kinda felt like I was in an old school 21st Century real estate commercial!

Now, about that sign on a random house in Austin two years ago…

When it comes to listening to my heart and being the one to choose a place where I could feel truly at home, here’s why I believe someone, somewhere, somehow was conspiring in my favor two years ago…it said:

Know your power…Live your life. Indeed.

P.S. What deep desires have you been shoving to the back burner? How badly do you want to taste them? What’s it going to take for you to act on them? I’d love to hear from you!

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Taking The Stage, Fear and All

In a Ted Talk given by Sarah Kay of Project V.O.I.C.E., she recites two poems and speaks candidly about the power of the written word spoken aloud. There was a moment during her talk when her nervousness was evident; she was even bold enough to call herself out on it while on stage. I’m sure I wasn’t the only person to connect with her in that moment when she showed us her humanity.

Her sense of playfulness, energy and spirit resonated on a deep level with me, and although she’s a seasoned spoken word artist, she still experiences nerves on stage, but no matter the fear, she does it anyway.

Performing ones words on a stage is risky business.

I do it here and occasionally exit this virtual stage for a real one at say a workshop, networker or a convivial gathering. Every time I think of getting up in front of people, I imagine all chairs screeching so audience members can get a better look at me, and the nerves come out to play, but…I do it anyway. I recognize that one aspect of my discomfort in having all eyes on me is the introvert in me, but thankfully, I’m affable and can balance it out. The bigger part is simply a matter of more practice. Just as babies don’t walk out of the womb, neither should we think our fear of the unknown or stepping out in front of people to do what it is we do (or want to do) can be overcome in an instant or banished altogether.

We never stop fearing. We only get better and bolder at facing it. (more…)

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Convivial Cameo: Karie Hill, Financial Freedom Coach

“There are three crucial types of education: Academic education- reading, writing and basic math; Professional education- the skills to work for money; and Financial education- the skills to have money work for you. Which of the three were you taught?” -Robert Kiyosaki, Rich Dad, Poor Dad

Today, my Convivial Interview series begins! I’m going to be featuring some amazing women who personally influence and inspire me. You can look forward to these women’s stories of how they’re making tough choices, taking risks, and pushing through the glass ceilings of self-limitation in their minds to create meaningful lives for themselves and others. Stop by each Monday for the next month for all new, inspiring interviews. Let’s get started!

In November 2010, I attended Rich Happy & Hot LIVE with Marie Forleo in New York City and met a beautiful woman from the Chicago area named, Karie Hill. On a break, we got to talk and I asked her about the work she was doing in the world and she said, “I practice Financial Well-being and teach others how to do the same.” As the Chavarria family CFO, an ex-banker-turned-entrepreneur, and Convivial Life Strategist, my eyes lit up as I envisioned the worlds Karie could rock for the better.

Meet the woman behind KDH Financial, Karie Hill

and see why I believe her work can change so many people’s lives, including yours… (more…)

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Behold The Unveiling: Convivial Society relaunches as The Convivial Woman

Ladies and Gentlemen,

It’s the most anticipated event we’ve all been waiting for…

Relaunch Day for TheConvivialWoman.com!

Before you make your way around the site for a peep at what’s new, I’d like to share a personal message on audio with you, but first, this quote…

“The work of art is another human mind incarnate; not in the flesh and blood, but in sounds, words, or colors.” -The Art Instinct: Beauty, Pleasure, Evolution

CLICK HERE TO LISTEN TO MY WORDS & MORE

.

As The Convivial Woman, I am here to say…
Every woman is a masterpiece.
An extravagantly unique & inimitable creation. Her very existence is a great work of art.

And ask the question…
So, how do you treat a work of art?

It’s my personal commitment to live the answer…
With dignity. Reverence. A sense of majesty. And a sense of humor.

My desire is to inspire the same in you.

I’m all about Convivial Living…

joyful connecting, conscious action, and uncompromising self-care, and I plan to fill this space with a plethora of refined word gems to demonstrate that. When you make a conscious choice to see and treat yourself as a work of art, you inevitably create a life of artful intention for you and the world around you. That’s what we’re here to do.

“I’m not a businessman. I’m a business, man.” -Jay-Z

The Convivial Woman is not only my artform, it’s also the work I’ve been called to do in the form of articles, lifestyle guides, 1 on 1 strategizing sessions (think: creative brainstorming/dream accountability partnerships), intimate workshops and travel retreats. To receive updates, news and special links and offers on events as they happen, sign up here.

To celebrate my shape-shifting nature along with this grandiose day, stay tuned for an extra special blog post tomorrow, then join me for a series of Convivial Interviews starting this Monday, March 14 where I’ll feature some amazing women (and men!) who inspire me. We’ll talk about life, love, entrepreneurship, spirituality and share tips on breaking free from self-limitation. They’ll also share how they are making the very personal choice to show up in the world and give you a sneak peek into their convivial lives, as well. It’s gonna be fun!

If you haven’t done so yet…

Become a member of The Convivial Society

– now known as my monthly newsletter- to receive important links, event news, and personal messages from me. Drop your name in the hat right here.

I’d love to interact and know more about you, so honor me with your presence and LIKE my Facebook fanpage or follow me on Twitter as well.

Join me for tomorrow’s very first blog post as www.TheConvivialWoman.com- I’m calling it Up Your Convivial Game because that’s what each new day calls us to do. You can come back on your own or have it delivered directly to your inbox.

Now go ahead and peek behind the imaginary turquoise curtain and take a stroll around the newly revamped site to get to know more about me and what I am offering. Convivial times await you and I…

With fierce admiration,

Cheryl Chavarria

P.S. I’d love for you to say hello with a comment on the blog (below), or on facebook and twitter so I know you honored me with your presence!

P.P.S. If you want to finish jamming to that song I shared in the relaunch memo, CLICK FOR SONG HERE. See you tomorrow!

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My Offline Escapades: Vol 2

“Thinking is underrated, don’t you reckon? In this little world of ours, we’re told we need to BE the best, GET the job, MAKE something of ourselves. But when was the last time you just sat down and pondered a little?” -Frankie Magazine

These were some great words to accompany me on my own pro-pondering expedition during the month of January. I went on a complete writing break to immerse myself in the non-digital written word for the purpose to rebuild myself through art.

I’m someone who best recognizes herself through writing and I made a conscious decision to temporarily close up my thought shop and zip it.

What I’m seeing now is how that choice was quite the revolt in nature, equivalent to me cutting off my creative blood supply. (more…)

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My Offline Escapades: Vol I

For the month of January, I went on digital sabbatical with the intentions to reconnect, rediscover and redefine my purposes here at Convivial Society (soon to be renamed and relaunched as The Convivial Woman end of February).

So, January has come and gone and I’ve returned on this fine, icy, cold day in February. Yes, me, Cheryl Chavarria A.K.A. The Convivial Woman is saying Bye Bye sabbatical, Hello writing again.

Wow! January was intense and unforgettable for me. Please tell me you’re all goo goo gaga about my return, because this is a big deal for me! I was beginning to feel pent up like a genie in a bottle. Being offline and in a sense out of touch was starting to wear on me…shall I dare talk about how moody and out of my comfort zone I felt toward the end?

Where to begin, ya’ll?

There are various experiences to share about my offline escapades, so get ready for (more…)

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ON CONVIVIAL SABBATICAL

For the month of January and to kick off the new year, I’m going into full immersion mode and taking a sabbatical.

As I’ve written throughout 2010 and pondered the idea of a Convivial Society, I have decided that to create and experience such a place, you have to start with the very element that sets its foundation, that gives root to the possibility of its creation and existence, and that is the woman…a convivial woman. For this reason…

I’ve decided to rebrand by changing the name of the site from Convivial Society to… (more…)

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Inspired & Home from New York (Pics)

It’s been three days since my return from an eye-opening weekend in New York. The memories continue to replay in my mind…the chemistry I felt with the city, with the women who surrounded me, the impact of the stories and knowledge shared by each speaker, and the guards let down and tears shed by various women of the audience at Rich Happy & Hot LIVE.

My second day back home, I shed some tears of my own as I spoke to a dear friend by phone and began to express my deep gratitude for our friendship and their continued unconditional love and support in my efforts to express The Convivial Woman and grow in the comfort of my writer’s skin. When someone believes in you and just loves you for all that you are and all that you’re not (yet), what a powerful force you can be in the world!

I love telling stories by way of the eye, and you’d better believe I snapped a good number of moments while in The Big Apple. So have yourself a look-see at my photojournalism skills! There will be plenty of time to share words, but for now, let this visit to Convivial Society be a visual experience to enjoy. Let me know if anything grabs you by the heart!

Click on the album to view and experience New York with me all over again:

NewYork2010

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A Rich Happy & Hot LIVE Experience in NYC

The weekend has come and gone! Rich Happy & Hot is over and officially another unforgettable, incomparable experience under my belt.

Here I am sitting at LaGuardia waiting to board my flight and I could talk excitedly about how amazing and inspiring Marie Forleo is, how she’s the real deal when it comes to a business woman showing up 100% as herself, how I met so many amazing and inspiring women with some impressive businesses in the making, etc etc…all true details, but honestly, my emotions are still processing everything in it’s entirety that I experienced this weekend. 

Something big definitely happened

at Rich Happy & Hot LIVE, because whenever something major is happening within or around me, I get quiet. Yes, me- a writer, and occasional loquacious convivial woman, has no words to describe my feeling yet. Powerful, mind-blowing, phenomenal sound weak. So how about I just say (more…)

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My New York Minute: Day 1.5

I’m awake thanks to a phone call from an old friend, Lola getting in touch with me. She lives here in NYC and we now have plans to dine and maybe dance this Saturday night. 

Let me tell you Miss Lola’s dancer name should be Rita, because those hips and feet of hers are dangerous on the dance floor. 

I know Lola from growing up in Chicago and I never forget a woman who can twirl the way she does! I can’t wait to see what moves she’s got now.

The convivial mama slept well, but before knocking out, I had a guy outside my hotel window pacing back and forth, screaming into his phone calling someone a hoe repeatedly. He was enraged and I thought, how sad…and how New York.

Last night at the Brass Monkey (more…)

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My New York Minute: Day One

I’ve stopped to take a break in the Financial District to rest a bit and write.

So, I’ve finally made it to New York. It’s big, it’s sweet, and I’m definitely gonna take a bite outta this Big Apple. 

Day 1

Took an early flight. As the plane’s engine was revving up for take off, I peered out the window to see the airplane’s wings and thought, “Let’s do this!” Then…I fell asleep. 

When the captain announced it would soon be time to land, I felt the plane start to descend, so I decided to open up my window pane and just as I did, my eyes were greeted by the beauty of (more…)

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